6 Nations Hero & Villain Award - Week 3

Another week, another action packed weekend of test rugby has passed us by and there were some stand out performances both good and bad.

Hero

This week's 6 Nations Hero award goes to Stuart Hogg of Scotland. I said in a previous post he will be an important element of Scotland's attack in the future and he proved it against France. Alright Scotland lost, but Hogg impressed me immensely and Scotland finally have hope that some talent is emerging in the backline. Well done, sir.

Villain

Now many of you will expect me to give Steve Walsh or Iain Ramage (TV ref) this week's award, but you'd be wrong. As much as I believe Strettle grounded the ball, if the shoe was on the other foot I'd argue 'til I was blue in the face that you couldn't award a try. So someone else gets it this week.

And that someone is the tatooed, butter fingered felch-bucket that is Courtney Lawes. Many, including me, called for him to be back in the England team. He got his chance but broke English hearts. Allowing the ball to be ripped so easily in a strike position for Wales is unforgivable. Alright, Scott Williams finished well *lucky bounce*, but Courtney, Courtney, Courtney, you fucked it up, son. Sadly, he's now out for the rest of the tournament so won't have the opportunity to redeem himself. Fart in a jar for that man.

When Two Objects Collide

When two moving objects, both possessing momentum by virtue of their mass and velocity, collide with one another, there is a total momentum that is equal to their combined mass and the vector sum of their velocity.

The total momentum is the sum of the various individual momentum products. In terms of a formula, this is expressed as MV = m1v1 + m2v2 + m3v3 +… and so on.

Basically, this means that if Manu Tuilagi and Jonathan Davies hit each other at full tilt on Saturday, there’ll be one giant fuck of an impact.

Both men are 6’1”, Davies weighs in at 103kgs (16st 3lbs), Tuilagi tips the scales at 110kgs (17st 5lbs), and according to my calculations – formulated extremely scientifically using a stop watch and clips from YouTube – both men travel at about 18.5 mph when they’ve got the afterburners on. Given they’re both playing at 13 and will have plenty of space to get their speed up I’d wager we’ll see at least one collision that, if inflicted upon us mere mortals, would dispatch us into a celestial realm quick-smart.

It’s set up to be an absolute ripsnorter. Wales are still favourites, but with the changes England have made the chances of an upset have risen, not massively, but they have risen.

Game on.

England: 15 Ben Foden, 14 Chris Ashton, 13 Manusamoa Tuilagi, 12 Brad Barritt, 11 David Strettle, 10 Owen Farrell, 9 Lee Dickson, 1 Alex Corbisiero, 2 Dylan Hartley, 3 Dan Cole, 4 Mouritz Botha, 5 Geoff Parling, 6 Tom Croft, 7 Chris Robshaw (capt), 8 Ben Morgan

Replacements: 16 Rob Webber, 17 Matt Stevens, 18 Courtney Lawes, 19 Phil Dowson, 20 Ben Youngs, 21 Toby Flood, 22 Mike Brown

Wales: 15 Leigh Halfpenny, 14 Alex Cuthbert, 13 Jonathan Davies, 12 Jamie Roberts, 11 George North, 10 Rhys Priestland, 9 Mike Phillips, 1 Gethin Jenkins, 2 Ken Owens, 3 Adam Jones, 4 Alun Wyn Jones, 5 Ian Evans, 6 Dan Lydiate, 7 Sam Warburton (capt), 8 Toby Faletau

Replacements: 16 Richard Hibbard, 17 Paul James, 18 Ryan Jones, 19 Justin Tipuric, 20 Lloyd Williams, 21 James Hook, 22 Scott Williams.

6 Nations Opening Weekend Hero & Villain

New for the 6 Nations 2012, the Eyes Right Hero and Villain award. This will be presented after each weekend of the 6 Nations. The hero wins a lifetime subscription to this blog, the villain wins a fart in a jar.

So, after the opening weekend the awards go to...

HERO

Julien Malzieu - Quick, strong, clinical. He will be a real handful this competition and, for my money, could be the player of the tournament.

Allez le stubble!!!




















Villain

Wayne Barnes - Started so well and oversaw the game of the weekend. But two bad decisions cost Ireland the game. A match of that quality should never be decided by the ref.

To the gallows with you, Barnes.




















Who were your heroes and villains this weekend? Leave a comment with your thoughts.

The Hard Luck of the Irish

The 6 Nations is up and running and what an interesting first weekend it’s been. England got the win they desperately needed to give the young pups some confidence. France took Italy apart at what seemed like a canter. And Ireland were robbed.

[Cue Welsh bile]

I know, I know, Wales scored more tries blah blah fucking blah, but the fact of the matter is, my friends from beyond the toll gates, you were very lucky indeed. I have no doubt the legacy of furious fans frothing at the mouth over Warburton’s World Cup dismissal had an impact on Wayne Barnes and his touch judge deciding not to send off Bradley Davies.

You could almost see the fear in their eyes as they consulted over the decision. Even a whiff of red from Barnes’s pocket would have been enough to unleash a baying mob of pissed up Welshies wielding competition sized leeks, poisonous daffodils and Duffy CDs fashioned into rudimentary hatchets.

Perhaps more disappointing though was the match-winning penalty awarded to Wales for the Stephen Ferris “tip tackle”. This wasn’t a tip tackle. In no-one’s world was this a tip tackle, it wasn’t even a dangerous tackle, and it cost Ireland the match.

I agree with the analysis of Guscott, Davies and Wood after the game. The IRB have to act on the tip tackle interpretations as quickly as possible in order to deliver common sense and consistency. We cannot continue to have games being affected in such a dramatic way because of player and refereeing uncertainty.

Davies: Off the ball tackle, lifts player to beyond the horizontal four foot in the air, intentionally drops player, player falls on upper back and neck with full weight of the body

Ferris: On the ball tackle, one leg taken above horizontal, other foot barely goes six inches off the ground, player lands on side